Wait! How the hell did you get here?

Era 1 : STAGE OF LIMBO. 23.11.2022
I'm starting a journal again even if I and everyone who has ever known me all know that I can't really keep up with a journal to save my life. I forgot about my old one and surprise surprise it somehow ended up in the trash a long while ago! I just wanted something to do since life has been pretty damn uneventful. All I really do is go to school and hang out with a couple friends. Speak of the devil! My childhood friend Aspen has been acting really off recently, she's been talking about how the air feels way too hot for it to be winter, I've noticed it too but I don't make a huge fuss about it. I guess we can blame global warming for that, huh? The air feels scorching and it's getting worse every month. Maybe even every week at this point. Wouldn't be surprised if all of us got grilled alive. Ha ha.

The way she's been acting has been making both Cado and I feel really uneasy. It’s taking a huuuuuuuge toll on Cado which in turn is having it's effect on my mental health. I honestly feel like punching Aspen sometimes. Just to bring her back to her senses. The main reason isn't that she’s talking about the weather being weird, it worries me too. It's that she’s hurting the person I care for the most in this stupid fucking school full of stuck ups. Honestly I'd be glad if I had an excuse to punt a couple of the assholes in this school in the face!

Adding ''wishing that punching Aspen dead in the face would stop the fires of hell from coming down to earth so I could save the world, winning over Cado's love finally.'' to the list of wishes to make whenever the clock hits 11:11 or there's a star swooping past us. :-)

It's me again, it's the same day. I just got home from school. My biology teacher was supposed to tell us about global warming and it's effects on the evolution of creatures around us, but she went on a really odd tangent about Dante's inferno for about 45 minutes until the class ended. She was talking about how the whole concept of 9 levels of hell actually applies to the future of ecology? Specifically how the weather will change and thus steer evolution into a whole new direction. Weird shit! She talks a lot about these kinds of things, sometimes it feels like she's making those weird outlandish claims as a way to throw shit at a wall to see which prediction sticks and makes her famous. Perhaps she's trying to win someone over too.

On an even more off putting and personal note, I recently had a really fucking long talk with Cado. He almost refused to acknowledge that I have legitimate feelings for him. I was talking with him outside of school and he just... Wouldn't look me in the eye. Literally AND figuratively. I tried telling him about how I was thinking about having a future with him after we both graduate, and how I'd love to spend my entire life with him. I almost feel like he’s taking steps away from me and our possible future together. He refuses to acknowledge me and everything I've worked so hard towards during the time we have been friends.

He hasn't read my texts despite replying to Aspen in our collective group chat a few times. It's crazy how he seems fine without me and it honestly breaks my heart to a million pieces.

Cado was one of the only people I couldn't hate even if I tried. I've had my fair share of dramas and arguments with Aspen, even thinking I'm in the middle of one right now- We seem to be fighting constantly. Cado and I were fine before, we were so close before I went and fucked it all up with my emotional bullshit.